All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
