I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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