Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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