Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
