it was like his penis was on wheels.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
