i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
