just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
This house was built for laser tag.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
