And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
