Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
