im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
