It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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