Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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