Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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