So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
