i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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