You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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