he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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