I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
