I wish my penis had an off switch
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
