So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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