Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
