I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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