Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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