love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
