I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
