I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
