Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
