She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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