if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
