i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
