my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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