If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize