Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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