hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
