So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I need to sanitize my soul.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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