Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
