Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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