If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
