We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I should be sponsored by Trojan
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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