So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
