im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
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