Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Is it penis luge time yet?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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