this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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