Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
