You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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