My balls are so social today.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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