Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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