ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
