yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize