So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
