1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize